Three people have been fundamentally important to me – Chiara Lubich, Paulo Freire and Martin Buber. Three lives, three experiences, three masters in dialogue, and three different cultural worlds. I will attempt, through a kind of imaginary round table discussion, to allow these three to dialogue briefly on “education in dialogue.”

I met Chiara Lubich in 1971 in her community – made up of those following her way of life, her “Ideal.” I had just enrolled at the university, and meeting her was something so totally new for me that I came to understand the importance of education.

She immediately gave me several techniques, or tools, for dialogue.These were not purely theoretical points, but rather the fruit of a lifestyle, a concrete experience in interpersonal and communitarian relationships. Since I saw it being put into practice, I began to understand the Art of Loving, of which Chiara was a great master.She wisely knew how to connect theory with practice, not only talking about the Art of Loving, but actually living it, bearing witness to it, and experiencing it herself.

A short time later, when I had my first exam in pedagogy, I encountered Paulo Freire, the Brazilian educator and theorist, through his book, The Education of the Oppressed. In it he proposes dialogue as the fundamental dimension of the pedagogical experience.

Since then, I had often the occasion to quote Freire’s work to my students and in other contexts.

Then, towards the end of my university, during a philosophy class, I “met” Martin Buber. My professor, who was a well-known scholar, mentioned this Jewish thinker, whom he said could be considered the “philosopher of dialogue.” Really struck by this description, I wrote down on a piece of paper the name of this “thinker,” unknown to me at the time. He immediately sparked an interest in me, as I started to study his works. In the end I wrote a book published in 1994 called Education in Encounter: Martin Buber on Education. For all three figures, the question of educating to dialogue emerged during a time of suffering or tragedy.

More than 70 years ago, in 1938, Martin Buber was fleeing the Nazi regime. In the precariousness of that situation, he wrote, “We are living in an age ‘without a home,’ we are lost in ‘open country’ and we don’t even possess four poles to build a tent.” Buber was referring to a more intimate dwelling, more essential and urgent – an existential dwelling that he defined as “I-Thou,” an authentic encounter, a dialogue that calls each one to move out of self-centeredness.

A few years later the young Chiara Lubich was living through the drama of World War II in Trent, Italy – the collapse of homes destroyed by the bombs, but more so, the collapse of values and ideals to live for.

Starting from that concrete experience of global destruction, she entered into a dialogue with someone who does not collapse and cannot be destroyed and who speaks Words of Life – God. She discovered the constructive, educational power of love and in particular, of mutual love. She began to build homes, form Focolare houses where differences co-exist, where a community of people live in dialogue, in the understanding that “Where two or three are united in my name, there am I in their midst” (Mt 18:20). In her case, too, the explosive power of dialogue emerged from the ruins, from the darkest crisis, and she allowed herself to be carried forward by a hope that overcomes all obstacles.

Paulo Freire also deplores the sense of being an orphan which one feels after living through injustice or oppression, in a world where conversation is an empty monologue. For him, it is the creative power of dialogue that can rebuild humanity.

In different ways, Martin Buber, Paulo Freire and Chiara Lubich all insist on the human being as the place of encounter and dialogue. In their view, dialogue is the very essence of a person, the dimension that makes us human, the principle and goal of our life.

The journey of humankind, the existential journey, the path to authentic fulfillment of one’s identity is the journey of hospitality, of “word” that becomes “dialogue,” allowing us to enter into the shared dwelling of authentic relationships.

What are the fundamental dynamics for an authentic dialogue? The art of inviting others Hospitality presupposes the art of inviting others. An invitation indicates that you have something to offer, to share and at the same time it also expresses a desire.

We invite a person by “asking,” thus recognizing the importance of the “Thou” of another (Buber says the “Thou” is someone, “never just something”), and also showing the other that we are poor and needy in front of him or her.

The awareness of one’s own “poverty,” which is the same as “humility,” is the starting point for establishing an authentic encounter, one that is not based on the overbearing display of wealth or knowledge, but only on the poverty of the one who knows how to share.

To offer hospitality presupposes an “unconditional acceptance” of someone.

The attitude of unconditional acceptance of others is a very strong point in Chiara Lubich’s proposals, “love everyone,” “be the first to love,” which are directly connected to the command to “love your neighbor as yourself” (Mk 12:31), and another phrase from the Gospel, “Whatever you do to the least of my brothers, you do it to me” (Mt 25:40).

All of these points have profound educational implications. To educate is undoubtedly a process of inviting and being hospitable.

Hospitality is two-sided; it is dialogue.

The principle of hospitality is fulfilled in what Buber calls “reciprocal inclusion” and a “reciprocal experience of the other side.” The path that leads to the other, that leads to “his or her house,” is “empathy,” the capacity to put oneself in the shoes of the other (in his or her thoughts, needs, desires, mentality, experience, history) while remaining oneself, keeping the necessary interpersonal distance, since the “I-Thou” is not fusion or identification.

It is, as Buber insists, a matter of looking at one another and speaking to each other on opposite shores, knowing all the while how to pass over to the other side, how to put oneself on the other’s side.

It is exactly this act of putting ourselves on the other side, and looking at things from a different perspective that will allow us to achieve a new, enriched identity, an alter-identity. It can make me ready to see myself in a new way and allow me to change (Buber says, “I construct myself in you.”) Freire writes: “In this way the educator is not only the one who educates, but while he is educating, he is educated through the dialogue with the student who, in turn while being educated, is also educating.” We find ourselves then at the center of the very precious dimension of “reciprocity,” which is mutual love, always rich in fruits and gifts and which for Christians includes a sacred dimension, finding and becoming an immense and profound icon of the Trinity.

As we journey along together, like the disciples on the path to Emmaus (see Lk 24:13-35), we speak together, we communicate our stories and concerns, we discover with amazement that we are accompanied by an unexpected guest who is only outwardly a stranger.

Giuseppe Milan

Giuseppe Milan is director of the Center of Social and Intercultural Education at the University of Padua and a member of the Focolare Education and Unity association.